Why I ruin everything?

Since I decided to loose weigth (fat) but nothing changed at all.
I even gained some weight. Few days everything was okay,and I lost about 2 kgs,but then...
I stared to eat sweets,junk food etc.,and time to time I overate myself..I feel bad for it now,because I would really like to have my dream body (I don't want to be extra skinny girl,that you can't hug because you would break her bones..) I want to be fit,and gain some muscles,and have flat belly,and I know I can do it,but somehow I'm still on the same place,and I'm f*cking tired to be that fat girl.



well I'm glad food isn't fear for me anymore,but sometimes I wish it was.
Everyday I told myslef I will eat healther tomorrow,but I always find myself eating junk,sweets or unhealthy food....

But I was looking for some plans,new workouts and stuff and I found few things,so I'm going to try it,and see what it does with me. And hopefully I will reach my goal weight till March,I told myself I want to weight 47-45 kg untill then. So lets see what I can do,I also started nike training club program,and going to to tabata,and cardio (well just low impact cardio because my parents don't like when I lots of jumping things,so I can do hiit or cardio only when they aren't at home. I think it wont be that hard.

 I know I said I don't want to be skinny girl,but I want to try this plan because the other ones look really triggering. So lets do this!


Also I will try to take pictures of my progress,so you will see how I am doing...






And I would be really glad if I look like this in few moths. :) so wish me luck